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Post by Lanuit on Oct 13, 2009 18:02:13 GMT
Dear UCAS, I hate you and your personal statement thing DIE!
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Post by naaaat on Oct 13, 2009 19:09:39 GMT
Dear Yazz, Ah, I remember the hell of the personal statement I spent two months not being able to write anything and then wrote the whole thing in two days! Don't worry about it too much; once you've got your opening lines it's generally fine Love Natalie x
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Post by traceybradley on Oct 13, 2009 21:07:47 GMT
Dear fate
Why play this game?
Love Tracey
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Post by dearjulietx on Oct 13, 2009 21:39:50 GMT
dear S,
GET BACK HEREEEEEEEEE. I miss you.
loveeee, L.
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Post by shannon on Oct 14, 2009 9:12:18 GMT
dear yazz, the opening line is the biggest bitch! what/where are you hoping to study? good luck ;D love shannon x
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Post by victorinox on Oct 14, 2009 12:25:20 GMT
dear anthropology teacher, i'm sorry that i'm presently skipping your class. this is because my heart is mending itself together, and i'm tired so i didn't feel like being late anyways and having to listen to the strident music they play after the first bell. seriously, not in the mood. you know how sometimes you just need a free hour to get everything back in order? yeah. i promise i'll pay really close attention tomorrow. also, i'll avoid putting my hand up to say stupid things. thanks, v
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Post by glumbumble on Nov 16, 2009 20:58:30 GMT
Dear body,
Why do you react as if I hadn't slept enough?! I slept enough, wtf, stop making me fall asleep in class, it's annoying. And stomach, I never asked to take those meds, so stop punishing me, kthnx.
Thanks, Clara.
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Post by Ana on Nov 18, 2009 11:53:03 GMT
Dear L Karmas a fucking bitch isn't it? Love, A
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Post by Rhiflect on Nov 18, 2009 19:03:34 GMT
Dear Naomi, I'm a little dubious about being invited to 'jam' at your house, since this has recently meant that I am to be grillled about arguments or forced to bitch, at which point I become a stuttering, incoherent wreck because I KNOW you are going to use my words against me. Hm. Love, Rhianne
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Post by idreamofcherrypies on Nov 25, 2009 23:52:10 GMT
Dear Matt, I know it's strange writing this in a letter but it never occurred to me to say it until I'd gone into my room and it was too late then. Why do you keep telling me you like 80s music and Roxy Music but didn't know who Brian Eno was? Also, we'll discuss feminism when you understand its basic principles from a reliable source, yeah? Jeremy Clarkson does not count. Cara x
Dear Mike You really remind me of Robert Smith. I'm apologising in advance if I call you Bob out loud, I do it in my head quite often by mistake. From Cara
Dear Mary Shelley, Did you really have an affair with Byron? Were you pissed with Percy's Preface? I would be. Did you really write Frankenstein as an autobiography, and did you intentionally imply that Percy and Byron have womb envy? Were you honestly hoping to hint that capitalism is just a bad dream? More importantly if you've read Moretti and Johnson's interpretations of your novel, and I hope you have, which do you think offers the most illuminating perspective on the novel? If you could reply this week and limit your answer to between 500 and 800 words I would be really chuffed. From a genuine fan, Cara x
Dear Literature Society, I didn't pay a fiver for this wall of silence you know. I expect a poetry, cinema or theatre trip as stipulated in your online description. Cara
Dear cheese in the fridge I'm about to make a toastie or two. Pleeeeease grate yourself this once, I can't be bothered. I'll be in in a few minutes to check how it's going. Hungry owner x
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Post by husbandwifeheroin on Nov 26, 2009 0:03:17 GMT
Dear Paul
stop being lovely, I have a boyfriend and you make me feel guilty but warm and fuzzy
Peynado
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Post by katrick on Nov 26, 2009 16:50:11 GMT
Dear Hair I feel these past few months I've finally come to terms with you. You'll never be long, blonde or straight, but could you at least try not to puff out at the back? I await in eager anticipation, KWx
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Post by Rhiflect on Nov 26, 2009 18:15:28 GMT
Dear Acertainsomeone,
What's gwarnin' eh? Is this going to go anywhere? You don't call something that might not be just a friendship a friendship. Or maybe it is just a friendship. I do not even know. Yeah, a heads up would be nice. Also, would us meeting up be weird? I'm starting to think it may be. I dunno. SEE HOW UNCERTAIN I AM? Please indulge me on where you think this is going. TA! Rhianne x
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Post by tara on Nov 26, 2009 21:22:00 GMT
Dear mind, can you please stop focus on my stomach problem ? Thanks by advance. Dear stomach, can you stop hurting me like that or at least tell me why ? Thanks. (this is not interesting, sorry But it was important to write it)
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Post by Jazzy Jeff on Nov 27, 2009 19:17:42 GMT
Dear Wolfboard, can you please give me ideas for a fancy dress party with the theme 'occupations'? Love Jasmine.
Dear everyday environment What's with all these weird references to my life in 2005-2006? It's like some weird external force wants to make me feel 13 again, but I can't figure out why. Also, please stop it, as I was a highly depressed 13 year old. Love Jasmine
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Post by husbandwifeheroin on Nov 27, 2009 19:21:53 GMT
Dear Jazzy Jeff,
Batman
Peynado
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Post by Rhiflect on Nov 27, 2009 21:29:03 GMT
Dear Jasmine I was also a melancholy 13 year old, HIGH FIVE! RHIANNE x
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Post by Jazzy Jeff on Nov 27, 2009 22:24:57 GMT
Dear Pincer-willy-Peynado-Lupin GOOD PLAN. The shortlist is now a prison warden, Batman, and David Bowie. I wish I was a boy so I could go as a really awesome tranvestite. Jazzy Jeff
Dear Rhianne HIGH FIVE. I was already a relentless activist for anything I could think of by the age of 11, so by the time I was 13 the world had got to me and I was horrifically half hearted in my fight for equality. And I had no friends. BUT IT'S ALL GOOD NOW. (13 was also a 4 month long EMO phase. Fortunately there is no photographic evidence of this.) Love Jasmine
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Post by husbandwifeheroin on Nov 27, 2009 22:28:00 GMT
Dear Jazzy Jeff, BATMAN. Oh god the emo phase. Also, the 'equality' phase for me manifested as taking Antony and the Johnsons so seriously I cut all my hair off and demanded to be referred to as male Your Furry Condom X
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Post by Jazzy Jeff on Nov 27, 2009 22:33:06 GMT
Dear My Furry Condom (Excellent band name, in my opinion.)
BATMAN IT IS.
I am impressed. I did cut all my hair off and make a point of letting everyone know that I'd sleep with Kelli Dayton because she sings for the giiiirrrls and lesbianism should be a perfectly normal thing etc. But I never demanded to be referred to as male..that's hardcore.
Today I spent my RE lesson drawing Voldemort. Because I have a feeling that if God looks like anything he looks like Voldemort. I just thought you should know.
Love Jazzy Jeff x
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